Good days

A terrific day. With great trepidation, I decided to head downtown to the new mall and let Greyson take his afternoon nap in his stroller. It was an unnerving proposition. An average nap in his stroller lasts 45 min, and that isn't enough for him to go on till bed time. If he ended up exhausted by the end of the day because I wanted to go shopping, I'd beat myself up about it for weeks. Nonetheless, driven by cabin fever, I went ahead and fed him lunch, changed him and got him in the car, downtown and in his stroller at Bloomingdales by 1:15pm. Lo and behold, my child amazes me yet again. There was no fussing, there was no whining, he mumbled himself to sleep while I walked slowly around Bloomingdales, and then slept for an hour and a half! I didn't even have to keep the stroller moving the whole time! I tried on clothes, browsed (something mothers never do in the presence of their children), played with make up, strolled through stores...it was wonderful. Being downtown brought me back to my working days, and it made me feel alive somehow, like I was still part of the community that milled around there. That's something I really miss since I became a mother.

When Greyson was first born, people used to tell me to go out for dinners, get out more, do more stuff, because that was an easy time compare to what was ahead. Newborns sleep so much of the time, and are relatively portable. I didn't take that advice because at the time, everything just felt, for lack of a better description, too hard. When I look back on that season, I wish I took the advice that was given to me. I realized today that maybe I shouldn't make the same mistake about this season. Someday Greyson will be walking, talking, able to run away, and only taking one nap. My days of him peacefully napping in his stroller and immobile while I find the perfect structured jacket are numbered. I must shop while I can.

Other updates: Greyson says "Mama" all the time now. I think to him, the word has dual functions. At times, he's calling for me, other times it's just him needing comfort, food, attention, or to be put down for a nap. It think it's all synonymous at this point. One way or another, it kills me, kills me when I hear it. Nothing comes close to hearing your child say your name. Also, Grey's been spinning around his crib lately. We put him down with his head on the left and when I get him in the morning, he's rotated and is sleeping squished up against the bumper on the right. It's entertaining to watch him do it during naps on the video monitor. I love pictures of him sleeping.